Expat Life

How I Became a Bridesmaid Living Abroad

October 24, 2016
A Bridesmaid Living Abroad

Unsettling Feelings

Today I wanted to touch on something that has been weighing quite heavily on my heart over the past few weeks. My best friend (who lives in the USA) is getting married next year and I have been asked to be a bridesmaid in her wedding. Now you may ask “Why are you upset? You are going to be a bridesmaid in your friend’s wedding! You should be excited!”

I am excited and very happy to be a bridesmaid in my best friend’s wedding. The slightly upsetting part, however, is that I was going to be the Maid of Honor. Unfortunately, due to my relocation to Australia, my best friend thinks it will be too difficult (i.e. time zones) for me to help plan her wedding from abroad.

Now she is completely RIGHT! And I support her decision 100%, even if I’m a bit bummed that I cannot be her Maid of Honor. She wrote me a lovely note explaining that I was her first choice, but due to our unfortunate circumstances, she has to choose someone else. I could sense her anxiety and apprehension in the note about how I was going to react to the news, but even though I was bummed I couldn’t blame her because, in reality, it would be really hard to help her plan from abroad.

At the end of the day, I wanted her day to be perfect and I wouldn’t want to cause her any more stress because I was in a different time zone. I texted her immediately letting her know that Yes! I accept and I would love to be her bridesmaid, as well as letting her know that I understand and support her decision and I’m not upset about it.

A Bridesmaid Abroad

A Bridesmaid Abroad


A Bridesmaid Abroad

I am completely over the moon that she is getting married and so excited to be a part of her special day. However, it wasn’t until I recently went back home and went shopping for our bridesmaid’s dresses with the girls that it sunk in that I didn’t “really” feel part of the celebration.

Because I live in Australia now, and flights are expensive, I am only able to fly in a few days before the wedding. After acknowledging this and buying my plane tickets, it wasn’t until I started seeing the photos of my best friend and the other bridesmaids spending time together that I started to feel disheartened.

I am a bit upset that I cannot be there to participate in all the activities normal bridesmaids get too such as the bridal shower, bachelorette party, or even offer help relieve the stress of wedding planning. I don’t think it really sunk in that I wouldn’t be able to do these things until about a week ago. Being a bridesmaid abroad has by far been the most difficult thing for me since moving to Australia. I plan to make the most of it and I am still excited to be part of my best friend’s big day.

Check out the how the wedding weekend went here!

Have you ever had to miss out on something because you moved abroad or were traveling? If so, what was it and how did you go about becoming involved from abroad?

XX Court

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  • Reply Catie Heemskerk October 24, 2016 at 7:51 pm

    I am an EXPAT living in Holland originally from the UK. Whilst the distance is nowhere near as far I still miss out on a lot as I don’t have time or finances to travel all the time. I used to hate seeing pictures of my close friends together on holiday or celebrating birthdays etc and I have missed many things. It is hard! Really hard! I think it is lovely that your friend still choose you as bridesmaid despite the organisational difficulties but I understand your feelings. Thank you for linking up to #EatSleepBlogRT

    • Reply Court October 26, 2016 at 8:37 am

      Thanks so much for reading! Missing out on stuff back home is hard, but I know that if I was living back home without my partner then I would be miserable and wishing I was where I am now. So in the end, I just reflect on that I wouldn’t be as happy as I am right now living back home. 🙂

  • Reply Rach October 24, 2016 at 9:48 pm

    Ah, I really felt for you reading this. I’m looking forward to following your bridesmaid journey though. Although there’s thousands of miles between you and your BFF I’m sure your still just as close as if you still lived nearby. #eatsleepblogrt

    • Reply Court October 26, 2016 at 8:35 am

      Thanks so much for reading!

  • Reply Fridgesays October 25, 2016 at 5:44 am

    #eatsleepblogrt hmmm there must be a way around this? Skype dress shopping, make a cardboard cut out of yourself…it’s time to be creative and have some fun.

    • Reply Court October 26, 2016 at 8:34 am

      I was fortunate enough that my bestie planned the bridesmaid dress shopping while I was home visiting. Thanks for the ideas I will definitely try to think of something to try and be more involved!

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